*** after segun’s call*****
Bimpe: dammie, what is all this now?, how do I leave here now, your friend went home to bring money only for him to call that his house was robbed.
ME: I’m amazed too, infact, I don’t know what to do and I don’t know anybody else who can borrow me this money.
BIMPE: I must leave here today oooo, see the time now, its 11:52am already. I must leave here ooooooooo. Find something to do ooooo, ****she started bahaving funny******
ME: what do u suggest that I should do now?.
BIMPE: I don’t know ooooo. Just think of how you will get Tfare for me that will take me to PHC. Maybe you should call uncle segun back and beg him to refund that 5k, I will sort out how to get home myself.
ME: I’m not sure if segun will refund the money, but I think of something. Why not beg your cousin to borrow you the money. And when I send it to your account, you will refund back to him
BIMPE: I told you that my cousin is stingy and that we fought before my departure. Infact, when I went there to pick my school iD card, I gave him the best insults of his life. Dear, can you imagine what he said when I got there?
ME: what dear?
BIMPE: he said I should help him to fetch water from the well at the 5th house away from his house after he refused to give me money.
ME: but na waoo, that your cousin no dey try oooo. I wish to know him sha
BIMPE: pls no be dat one dey do me. Help me find means to reach PHC. Call uncle segun and beg him
ME: ok.
…..I picked my phone and dial sege’s number and placed it on
speaker.
ME: sege, how far na, abeg help me with that 5k, my babe dey cry here and he wan comot today.
SEGE: I no fit drop am ooo, dem don thief the one wey I get for house so this 5k na the last thing on me.
ME: abeg help me now.
SEGE: ok wait, let me call Akin and talk to him, I will get back to you..and he hanged up.
….I don’t know who Akin is but I am sure SEGE is up to another drama.. After 2minutes, segun called back.
SEGE: guy, I don talk to akin. He say him fit try help u make u come meet am, but him talk say I must dey there as guarantor incase of wahala.
ME: no problem now, how we go waka abeg?
SEGE: come meet me for house and we go go together go meet akin. Hope money for bike dey your hand oooo, I no go pay for any bike oooo. Akin talk say him fit help you 10k.
ME: thanks, I will be on my way. I hanged up
I opened my wallet and found out that I had just 200naira inside. I turned to bimpe.
ME: baby, there is another problem,
BIMPE: what is the problem again my dear, go and meet the so call akin now and get the money for me to leave here, its 12:09 already now
ME: I have just 200naira with me and if I should calculate the fare from my house to segun’s house and from segun’s house to akin’s house, I will spend 600naira since segun is going with me.
BIMPE: ok, take this remaining 500naira with me and add it to the 200naira with you. Pls be fast and hurry up.
ME: ok ****i collected the 500naira, dashed out of the house, stopped a 50naira bike and went to meet sege……………………….
On reaching segun’s house.
Me: sege how far
sege: mr maga. How u dey?
Me: na me be mr maga abi?, ur papa. Who is akin that u are talking about?.
Sege: u be mumu. U no knw say na drama i dey act?.
Me: just kidding. I don collect the remaining 500naira wey she hold.
Sege: confirm. Ur head don dey work. How u take do am?
Me: i tell her say i no get tfare take come ur place, she give me the 5hundred.
Sege: dat one nice, so ur balance remain 4,500 be that.
Me: oya give me the 5k make i dey go home.
Sege: u dey craze. So, u wan go give her the money abi?
Me: i just hold am. But to be serious, i dey pity bimpe sha
sege: u be mumu. She pity u wen she collect ur money go fuck person for free at ijoka?
Me: but she get test tomorrow na.
Sege: let her fail. Dat one go dey remind say “magacology” na bad elective.
Me: wetin i go come do next?,
sege: leave this money with me, dey go house go meet ur babe. Tell her say akin no see his atm card make she wait till 2maro wen u go enter bank go settle ur debit palava. Update me on whatsapp any development
Me: ok
i left segun’s house, stopped a bike an went home straight.
Me: sweetheart, helo
bimpe: dear, its unfair oo. U left since morning knowing that i will travel
me: so sorry dear.
Bimpe: oya where is the money?, its 1pm already, let me start going.
Me:***i broke the bad news as directed by segun.
Bimpe was sad, frown and started ranting. She picked her box
and bag.
Me: dear, pls wait till 2moro, i go to bank to settle the atm debit and give u the money.
Bimpe: i hav test tomorow, i cant wait. Let me go to my cousin and beg him again hopefully he can help me.
Me: but why are u going with your loads.
Bimpe: i dont have much time, if i can get the money, i will leave from there, but if i cant, i will return here to sleep.
Bimpe picked her loads and left at 1:20pm. Immediately after she left, her number wasnt reachable again. I said to my self, “chaiii, thunder fire segun and bimpe o. So i no go yansh this girl this nite”.
I opened her facebook account but no recent chat. I updated segun on whatsapp and he told me to lock up that bimpe is gone. So i zero my mind that she has left akure and that i paid 4,500 for one round of sex.
Up till 8pm, her number isnt reachable, i dropped my fone and slept off. At about 9:40pm, i heard a knock on my window. I asked “who is that?”. Its me bimpe, come and open the entrance door for me, the voice replied.
I jumped up, my Banana suddenly Stood Up...as i was heading towards the door and said to myself, let the Nagggging begin
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